How many bitter roots are found in those who call themselves Christians, in congregations and communities, amongst relatives and families!
I have often been shocked during my travels by the many petty squabbles among those who are supposed to represent the high goal of the Kingdom of God!
Bitterness arises from injustice, from slander, from hurtful defamation and judgmental attitudes, from unchristian actions and written misrepresentation. When I think of all the broken trust, the wounded and embittered hearts, all the missed opportunities to show love – then I must say: there is great, triumphant rejoicing in hell. Such quarrels have no place in heaven.
Would it be necessary for many church leaders to approach members of their congregation with a heartfelt, “Forgive me! In my zeal, I have sinned by acting without love.” And many congregation members need to find their way to their leaders and say: “Forgive me! My behavior was unloving and judgmental and not in line with Christ’s love.” Should not many brothers find a way to each other, to each other’s homes and hearts? In heaven, there will be joy among the angels that the children of God have bowed to one another and can forgive on another’s transgressions in brotherly love. This revival in the churches must come; otherwise, the bloodstains of destroyed brotherly love cannot hold back judgment of the church. Love is required to reveal the wrongdoing.
Genuine love also does not say: “I have forgiven – but I can never, ever forget.” Where true forgiveness happens, one can also let go.
Sadly, it is true that in some families, strife and unforgiveness are passed down from generation to generation. Christians are also in danger of becoming bitter through an experience that deeply wounds them.
“Love keeps no record of wrongs.” In an old translation, this passage says: “Love keeps no account of wrongs.”
We all have an unwritten account in our hearts, listing the great and small details from all the stories of the past:
• where we were hurt –
• where we were taken advantage of –
• where we were overlooked –
• where we were wronged –
• where we were insulted –
• where we were not honored, etc.
Such devastating, depressing bookkeeping! In this way, the devil magnifies memory and stokes the flames of bitterness. Is that genuine, strong Christ-like love? It keeps no record of offenses.
Now, I have a request: Destroy this bitter record and throw away the pen of unkindness and bitterness forever! Never, never keep a record of suffered wrongs again: forgive and forget!
God will bless you and make you very happy when you lovingly forgive. And, moving forward: never weigh anything on the stony scale of stumbling blocks – but everything on the gold scale of love that forgives.
And if you have had a very painful experience that could make you bitter, then take the following story as an example: A genuine, effective Christian experienced much disappointment through fellow Christians at his workplace. He had endured much misunderstanding through damaging, judgmental criticism and was at risk of becoming bitter. He then explained: “Only one thing saved me from bitterness. For months, I have prayed 1 Corinthians 13, the love chapter, twice a day, and then I feel empowered to love my brothers who have wronged me.”
I am certain the Lord will bless this man anew in due course and restore his honor. But you – go and do likewise – and you will be protected from bitterness.
Where do bitterness and unforgiveness lead? Here is a shocking, real-life example. A now deceased prison chaplain recounts the following from his time of ministry:
“A 28-year-old man was seated in his cell. He came from a Christian home. His mother was a leading social figure. The young man worked at a bank after his military service. He fell into bad company and succumbed to drinking. He embezzled a large sum of money – and soon landed in prison. It was here he came to his senses and repented. He was about to be released and wanted to return to his parents’ home. In response to my plea to receive him with kindness, the mother replied: ‘My boy! The pastor writes that you want to come home. That is out of the question. You have already caused us, your distinguished parents, so much heartache, and we have now been socially branded by your prison sentence. You can only do us one favor: remove yourself from this world as soon as possible.’ – The poor boy then granted his mother’s wish and left this life. The next morning, he was found dead, hanging in his cell – the mother’s letter was spread out on the floor.” That is where unforgiveness and bitterness lead when one refuses to forgive.
Dear reader, don’t you have a lot or a little in your life that you should forgive people for? Get on it soon, before the sun sets in the evening – for then it could be too late.
O love, as long as you can love,
And love, as long as you are able.
The hour comes, the hour draws near,
When at the grave you cry your tears.
Love keeps no record of wrongs!
Daniel Schaefer
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